mixed feelings.

When eating tons of chocolates doesnt make me feel better, that's the kind of mood i'm feeling now. sigh Aloy's very sick and he's sleeping now.. yest he puked after sending me home, i thought i was food poisoning so i cursed the pig organ soup he had for dinner. Thinking that he will feel better if i cook dinner for him so at least he will eat home cooked food and get better but after dinner (we had porridge) not even 10 mins later he went to puke, and puke and puke and puke, after dinner after back from the doctor, he puked 4 times just in a night. when waiting for cab he had the urge to puke again but i gave him dried orange skin and it stopped for a while but when he's home, he went to the toilet again. seeing him puke like this really want to make me cry. my heart is very pain can anyone understand? sigh and there's nothing i can do. my heart's aching now.. very badly :( we went to the doc and the doc say coz of the acne medication prescribed by Dr Loke, it's too acidic for him that's y he kept puking and he was too weak to stand on his own. i had to hold him up lor.. and his mum was working so i was the only one there. i'm not complaining coz i'm willing to do all this for him, to cook for him, to wash for him, even to the extend of applying cream for him on his toes and i had to masssage them for him.. but all this is nothing.. seriously i'm happy that i'm the one there but when he refuses to do what i say especially when i want him to do is FOR HIS OWN GOOD, it just breaks my heart. really. i dont think words can describe how i'm feeling now but sigh just hope that he'll get well soon i miss my darling's laughter :(( sigh this is so depressing.. the doc even ask if he had depression coz the medicine Dr Loke prescribed would have such side effects but i think now i'm the one who is not happy la.. sigh what an irony -_-'' maybe everyone needs to getalife! arrgh oh yes to share something happy for my GESL group, touch community has replied to our email and expressed interests to collaborate with us! Praise the Lord!!!!!!!!!!! I only prayed once regarding this, and indeed it's God's will that this cooperation will fall through. oh man.. THANK GOD! :) yup that's the only thing that made me a little better now and also looking at my piggily's niece photo also made me feel a little better. hope tmr's will be a better day. GOD BLESS ALL..