trouble-fied

A lot of things have happened recently and i suddenly felt very burden-fied.. not just my own studies and the fact that i've to attend classes everyday till SAT! 10-5 is indeed very very draining.. it's so boring and i just have to keep drinking coffee to keep myself awake.. sigh.. just when can all these #@$*^##$*&#*$&^T be over? sucks man.. dear dear's starting work next week tmr and luckily he's only working 3 hrs a day but next week he's gg for some 14 hr job thingy and the worse thing is that i have classes till 10pm on the few days he's working so late, think i'm so going to miss him.. :( but it's okay la.. When he first told me that he wanted to go work that thingy, the first thing that came to my mind was to ask him not to do it.. but i dint. I thought that it would seem selfish on my part that i had to deprive him of earning more cash so i let him be.. it would be good for us to take a 5 day break from each other also, maybe just to rethink our postition in this relationship. I told u that i'll never let go of the hand i've held. so i wont, unless u make me do it.(but i doubt so) i was both happy and sad when i told u that i wanted a 5 day break but u said NO. Happy coz i know how much u treasure me and dint want any breaks in between our relationship, Sad coz i know how tired you'll be and still u have to come and meet up with me just for a while. Sometimes i do feel that it's not worth the time.. but maybe for u seeing each other for a while is better than not seeing at all.. Sigh.. dont know la. i feel so troubled now. arrgh maybe everything will be settled soon. i also dont want to keep thinking about it coz i feel that it doesnt help and i got so much more things to bother about.. i just cant keep dwelling on the same things.. arrgh. a-loy told me that some of his poly friends have already received their enlistment letter and most probably his enlistment date would be arnd July or what.. i just dont want July to come coz i have a feeling that it's going to be a difficult time for me.. seriously.. sigh dont know la.. so many things--> so sucky. arrgh :/ also the application date for NTU and NUS have closed and i've submitted my applications. "Dear God please bless my application, Aloy's, xiaohui's,vivien's,caleb's and jr's that we'll be granted a place in the local unis and me, an interview and even to go through the interview without any hiccups. In Jesus name i pray and ask, AMEN." For all the others, please pray for me ya? i really really want to get into NTU. take care peeps. outta here

Passion for the Christ

Cant believe that i actually cried during service on Sunday when Church showed some short clips of The Passion of the Christ. Oh man.. i could practically feel tears welling up in my eyes and there was no where else i could look.. arrgh the whole atmosphere was just so tense and the feeling was totally different from what i had felt when i watched it at the cinema two years ago.. oh man.. it's like i can really feel the pain and this awful sadness stayed with me for the rest of the day.. After Service i went with Aloy to Airport to eat the supposedly nice satay from the staff canteen but i think alright only leh.. maybe the satay sauce is good but the satay were like very cold lor.. what the heck.. still got minimum purchase de.. kaoz anyway we studied for a while at Mac before we got shoo-ed away by the workers.. so we had to "forcefully" end our study session and go back to expo for the flee market.. heh nothing much actually.. all the stuff they were selling were more like unwanted then goods to be bought.. at least this is what i thought.. second hand toys that even the fur of the bears look grey-ish i mean this kind of things where got ppl want to buy? tsk tsk.. heh actually now i should be studying but i'm HERE! oh no.. gotta go liao.. Miss ya peeps :)

YES!

Just realised that i hadnt had any newer pics to upload but just coz my seafood taught me how to upload pics onto blog liao and i just cant stop it.. haha will do it again with my newer pics. outta here!!!

Who did this? hmmm.. heh
Happy birthday you are a mouse.. so sorry for the late upload of pics.. i'm a bit retarded.. heh
hah.. finally can upload liao.. all thanks to my seafood.. Ms black colour!!! *applause* lolz thanks girl.. oh yes.. this is my piggly niece.. got more pics to upload.. heh

♠♀--> co cool.. heh

Yest.. me and A-loy went to Queenstown library to study.. the environment is very good.. i mean it's cosy and not very noisy though we sat in the cafe.. after that we checked out receipe books.. (cant believe that he was as excited as i was) heh : note the greedy-ness : After that we decided to go Alexandra Market for dinner and the two of us were extreeeemelllllyyyy greedy.. we ordered black pepper crab ,bah kut teh and some veg to eat downing them with lime juice and sugar cane.. OMG how greedy can we get.. i mean like for 2 people.. that's considered quite a lot.. *snort* after that we went to ikea for ice cream.. tsk tsk now u all should know why i just cant slim down.. haha studies have shown that ppl who are in a relationship will tend to GAIN 3.5kg in a year.. oh man.. that's so bad.. but probably it only works in me coz dearie doesnt get fat AT ALL!!! that's so not fair.. arrgh but anyway we enjoyed ourselves very much, at least it made me forget what horrible things that had happened in the day. toopid NUS. toopid me. arrgh.. Just now i was making my famous cheese cake and it turned out to be a flop. what the heck la.. kaoz the cheese was ok but i think there's something wrong with the cream.. woa lao the two things just cant be blended in together.. wonder what's wrong.. i'm so gg to buy the ingredients and try again.. afterall i promised my aunt that i'll make some for my niece and nephew de.. sucks man.. oh yes.. the day before yest i made tea egg leaf and SLURRRPPPPZZZZzzz oink oink oink.. hehe very super nice but i feel that the herb smell have not yet penetrated into the egg so the smell and taste not very strong.. but still it's very nice coz the egg white is very bouncy(at least this is what my gm said) :P this week marks the end of my more-relaxed week coz starting next week i'm having revision classes everyday even till SAT!!! 10-5pm.. i think SIM is mad and i'm so gg to go mad already.. what the heck la.. arrgh but i'm so gg to make it through :X no choice la damnit. arrgh *God please give me strength* later i'm still going for tuition and tonight... meeting aloy for supper! YES!!!! why leh? coz both my parents are out of town.. lolz my dad havent come back from brunei yet and my mum just left for indo today.. heh.. i'm like a bird out of the cage.. haha cant believe this and i'm going to be 20 soon.. -.-'' sigh.. gg to bathe and maybe read some of my econs notes before i go out for tuition. outta here! *waves*

:(

Now i know that being your good friend wouldnt make me a good girlfriend.. :((

:/

One more last day before aloy comes back from Hong Kong.. cant believe i missed him so much that last night when he called i just couldnt control and cried. arrgh but nevermind. i'll be STRONG.. yes! i feel like gg for the flea market at expo.. arrgh should have went after service on sunday.. but i was alone.. :(

burrp ZZZZzzzz

heh.. super full.. just came back from the long awaited DIM SUM buffet with my SIM peeps.. heh quite successful coz we were all STUFFED. oh man.. i was so cheapo that i even brought extra plastic bags to put the fried prawn dumplings. at that point of time i even wished that my stomach was a "wu di dong" that i can keep stuffing myself with the food and not feeling full. lol but it was quite nice but maybe a bit ex. in the end the 6 of us each of us paid arnd $16+ but considering we ate like pigs and still got food to da bao back.. think it's quite worth it.muhaha the da-baoing process was quite heart-racing. had to keep checking out if got any ppl near me then must faster put the food back into my bag! lolz.. so funny and sian lye just couldnt stop laughing when she saw me da baoing the food la.. kaoz :X but anyway did enjoyed myself.. later gg to jog to lose all those fats again.but looking at the weather now.. maybe cannot. if rain how? haha excuses excuses.. :P haha after this week, i'm so gg to chiong again la.. sigh exams exams exams. how sick can they be. arrgh but i'm quite looking forward for this week's events. so many things planned up ahead.. tmr is our 6th month.. think we just gg to chill out at hh's place and watch spongebob's VCD.. wed bringing my niece and nephew to the zoo then at night meeting caleb and hjb for dinner, thurs i'm gg for the camp facilitator thingy, fri got tuition. arrgh.. long week man. but at least it wouldnt be a boring one. heh.. that's all peeps. outta here.. think i wanna search for another blog skin le. see if i can find any nice ones. miss ya all lots~

evofus

Vday'06

:))

Hei Se.. what's with getting dusty la.. tsk tsk ppl busy okie.. maybe+ lazy.. lolz this few weeks have been super happening.. got lots of activities posted despite the ever disgusting mock exam.. arrgh it's a sat and i cant believe i spend half of it rolling in bed till now then i woke up. arrgh just ike a pig *snort* actually i've been wanting to upload some pics onto my blog but actually i'm not really good at it or should i say i dont really know how to do it but i shall try! muhahaha ok.. i've uploaded many many photos onto photobucket but dont know if it's just cut and pasting the URl wait i'll try.. byebye..

Happy Valentine's Day'06

Valentine's Day for me and dear dear was a simple one coz i dint really think that it's a time for us to celebrate? haha coz everytime we go out together we eat as if we're celebrating.. haha :X We went holland V and ate delifrance bistro. not say very nice but it's rather ex. heez but i still enjoyed the meal :)) after that we actually wanted to head to hagen daez for fondue and NYDC for cheesecake de but seeing the long queue both of us ZZZZZZzzz haha so in the end we went to the market and enjoyed a bowl of ice kachang for $1.50 cheap and good. after downing the ice kachang we were like super full. our initial plan was to---->
1. eat the crystal jade chicken wings
2.go delifrance have fruit tart
3.eat the famous holland V (dry) fish hor fun
4.fondue at haegen daez
5.cheesecake at NYDC
in the end we bought a small cake from breadtalk and had our mini celebration at my house's bus stop.Coincidentally, it's our 5th month on Vday too so we had a small candle and aloy brought the cake home. nothing fanciful or what but still we did spent some time together. oh yes to update what i got for Aloy--> a esprit towel pack, some sweets, nice stamps and a boxers card with my lip print! haha so cool right? lolz what Aloy gave me--> one stalk of pink blended with white rose. it's damn nice but super ex $6 (woa lao), a crunpler pouch and a super nice but ex card. i love all of them but still next time can be more budget hor.. like me lidat.. heh but still thanks a lot hanie pokie. haha :-* for spending time with me despite your busy schedule. I cant believe this.. tmr we've booked Dim Sum buffet at dragon gate restaurant to pig out again?! hahaha so that's y i say actually Valentine's Day is not really a time to celebrate coz we are celebrating everytime we are out together. Maybe yesterday was just with the addition of some presents and roses, that's all and it's out 5th month together. Hope everyone did enjoy their V'day regardless of whether they have a partner or not. sigh. one day pass so quickly already. i must get back to my books and mug hard le.. exams are round the corner and i'm still slacking like mad.. arrgh. bye peeps. :) miss ya all hard~ shall upload some pics after Aloy send them to me *waves*

USR'06 rocks

Got back from the race last night, super paralysed. was already aching like mad during the race but still i persevered on and managed to get to the 15th position. ha! the details of the race are as follows:
Intro:
Me, Jing2, Aloysius and Charle formed a team of 4 to join the Uniquely Singapore Race together from the 11th-12th of Feb.
Day One:
We had to report at the Youth Park(behind cine) at 8 in the morning. So i had to wake up at 615 to bathe and get ready coz i wasnt sure if we would get to bathe at night. When we reached there, other teams were already getting ready liao. We werent told of the next destination but had to guess the clue from the drawings our minister of education. Well, the first part was a bit scary coz i tot that a stampede would happen coz all 400+ ppl were chiong-ing to the destination coz the clue was rather easy. So we ran there and deciphered the next clue to be at the Labordor Park. Luckily when we left the park, the bus to the park came and we hopped on. The route to the park was actually a torturous one but we actually cheated halfway coz we took a cab in if not think we'll die a terrible death if we were to walk in. haha when we found the checkpoint, obviously we were the first team to arrive.. haha the next stop was to go to china street to find some places selling pies that is the new singapore icon. apparently we misread the clue and tot that it was at chinatown but couldnt find anything. But still, we were the 1st team to reach the pie shop. Charle said that the pie is quite nice but i was too full to eat. Actually i cant really remember the sequence of the race but so far now. it's still the right sequence. haha the next stop,we went to suntec the fountain of wealth to get our next clue and the clue led us to the merlion where we had to pose with the lion and take a pic. after that we ran all the way down to clarke quay were one of the members had to do a challenge "GMax" oh man.. the reverse bungee thingy. i think it's damn scary but jing2 actually said that she wants to try *applause* haha i wouldnt dare do it coz i scared my heart stop ar.. lolz after that we went to little india and had to use the hanna paste to draw the USR logo on our hands. That was the first time i saw the real thaipusam going on. oh man.. i think it's damn scary lor.. i saw this guy had a pole-like thingy pierced through his mouth and connected to it was a trolley like thingy. i'm not so sure how to describe it but it was super scary and obviously super pain. :X after the henna drawing event, we went to one of the mosque near geylang area i think and we had to play "zero point" , "five stones" and "chapteh" aiyah i dont know how to spell.. haha after that we were give a clue and that we had to buy a lime mag to get to the next destination. but the shitty thing was that all the lime mags around the area have already been sold out and we had to travel all the way to funan to buy the mag. Just like that we've wasted a whole lot of time.The resting place was at Chinatown point but we couldnt find the checkpoint and end up searching for it again. +time wasted+. after a 2 hour break, the next challenge was to make a lantern similar to the sample lantern. it may sound easy but in fact it's not. we spend like 15-20 mins figuring out how to make the lantern and to make it. arrgh but this time we were already shagged, despite having a 2 hour break. if i'm not wrong the next stop was to go to geylang and we had to weigh a 1.5kg durian and eat it. the durian was superb but we had to eat it in a rush so quite pity. after that we rushed off to bedok market under blk 85 and we had to hike down 10km to our resting place for that day. i tell you the 10km hike was like (@^#(^$@(^ coz by that time my legs were already aching and having cramps. the worst thing was that we took a wrong route, got lost and had to walk an addtional 2+km.. arrgh finally we reached east coast park but we had to walk AGAIN to the chalet before our timing stops. luckily we came in 17th and slept in the airconditioned room *yeah* but apparently the air con was too cold and the floor too hard, i kept waking up in the middle of the night. arrgh
Day Two:
Our first stop was at Mac Ritchie reservior. We chose to do the land expedition but we took the wrong and longer route. By that time my knees were aching real bad and i felt like giving up. i dint want to hurt myself just for the race. Maybe that's coz i'm selfish. arrgh. But still, we carried on the next stop, we went to teck whye to get our clue and headed for Qian Hu fish farm. Over there we had to catch 16 fishes and then we can go off. i was happily catching the fishes when i saw Charle beside me, stirring the water like how u stir your milo. haha think he was trying to catch the fish but the fish was too fast for him. :P we completed the task easily and had to rush off to the next destination at Sembawang. The satay club. Oh man the satay was damn good coz we barbequed them ourselves and we also had to eat "yu sheng" in less than 5 mins. we completed that feat easily too coz we were too hungry.. haha the next stop was to go to the sembawang hot spring. we ran all the way in and the challenge was to use the hot spring water to cook an egg. we waited and when it was time, Charle the bravest ate the RAW egg. OMG it was not cooked at all lor. the water isnt hot enough and the egg white was still translucent.*yuck* Still we did it and proceeded on to seletar reservior to get our clue. it was nearly the end of the race le.. we had to travel from seletar to somerset, all the while running and when we got to the visitor centre we had to search for the clue which led us to douby gaut. there, Charle did absailing inside PS, then me jing2 and aloy had to belay him. it was a rather simple task for him coz he did it many times already. After that we ran and took a train down to orchard mrt and ran to scotts the foodcourt downstairs. it is the first foodcourt in a mall in singapore! we had to do something like the "shi zi lu kou" kind and had an 1 hr break there. from there we tot we just had to zoom to zouk thinking that it was the last stop but it wasnt. we had to go to raffles place first to visit an underground mosque. cool right? but we dint visit it coz we werent properly attired. after that we were given another 1 hr to rest before setting off for Zouk. It was the final countdown already. we ran all the way from the bus stop to Zouk and came in 15th. :))At last we completed the race, our timing was 33+ hours. WE COMPLETED THE RACE IN LESS THAN 34 HOURS!!! What an achievement! haha After that we chilled out at Zouk for an hour or so whilst waiting for the lucky draw( as if we are lucky enough to win anything) then we headed home.
Though we dint win anything from the race, but what i really gained from this race is stronger friendship and even to get to know singapore better. It was very-super-duper-extra tiring but still it was very enjoyable. Even though we had our agruments and unhappiness, i still treasure my team mates very much. Credit to go to Jing2 for organising us to join the race, Charle for navigating the route for us, Aloysius, my dear dear, thanks for being there for me when my legs felt like breaking, supporting me and caring for me throughout the race. Thanks for staying up to talk to me even when u are feeling super tired already. Thanks Dear :* -i dont know why i love you coz feelings cant be explained-

<3

HE: I love you.
SHE: How much?
HE: As much as i want you to be my wife.
SHE:*smiles*
Are we really meant to be?

...............................................

Guess a lot that has happened recently has got me thinking.. every small little thing. Apparently my mum has gotten wind that both me and my sis had bfs and she has been questioning us and lecturing us every night to find out the truth. the good thing? both of us denied la but my stupid sis actually went to tell my dad everything and the shit thing is that my dad "bao dou" her... so too bad.. haha but seriously this time i actually can feel my mum's concern for us but maybe in a wrong way? as in like she was more like intergorrating us rather than asking out of concern lor.. but still.. i can sense her concern.. haha she actually laid conditions i think no guys can ever reach lor.. so i think i just treat it as though she was nagging la.. i mean afterall i'm the one marrying the guy and staying with him for the rest of my life and not my mum dou.. so why should i do everything she says? i'm not sure if she's gonna approve aloy or what but we'll try to do our best.. i've thought of a damn "jian" strategy and needa the cooperation of either christina, caleb or fishy.. haha so peeps now all is up to you! haha.. shant rattle on the not-so-happy events dou.. erms.. oh yes CNY has just come and go and KAAA CHIIING!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm rich again.. finally and i found a few items to splurge on already.. oh man.. i must try and control.. haha as if i say le will do lidat.. but CONTROL I MUST!!! arrgh yawn.. cant believe i skipped today's lect and stayed at home to slack or should i say do my own revision? haha sian man.. NTU's application starts early March so peeps get ya com's ready! haha NTU here we come.. haha -_-'' sorry huh a bit off there.. lolz :P later in the afternoon i've got tuition and at night JR's going to treat all the tuition teachers to dinner. Let's hope we'll burst there.. haha yah la.. that's about all.. Can't wait for next week to come.. Esprit here i come! Birkis here i come! hahahaha bye all ~

happy new year everyone :))

"dong dong qiaaang.. dong dong qiaaang.." haha happy new year to everybody! :)) it's time to get fat oh yes.. got an annoucement to make
"my aunt got esprit 50% off everything so if u guys wanna buy anything can tag me and tell me ya.. give me the description, size everything and the clothes' code." think i'll be getting them next week so must tell me asap ya.. :) after CNY i'm so gonna be super rich and super fat so it's time to go back to exercise le.. hahaha ciao ppl.. :*

Dr Peh's evaluation :)

Case Study 1:

My friend broke up with her boyfriend and they had only been going steady for 6 months or so.
Dr's Evaluation:
i seriously think that there's no such thing as ''i love u forever'' coz there is no such thing as forever lor.. My friend was madly in love with her boyfriend and yet this had to happen.. She lives in Sembawang and her bf stays in chinese graden.. that's like super far away and yet she is willing to travel the distance just to go to her bf's place and even to cook for him.. YET.. the bf wants to break up just coz they quarrelled over some small thing. damns that's like so not compromising.. and when she wants to talk about it, the bf refuses to pick up her call, ignoring her totally. arrgh how can guys be so bastard. i mean he was the one who wanted to start this relationship and then now all this shit had to happen.. My friend's like super sad now she dint even attend class yesterday and today lor.. i also dont know how to help her.. arrgh luckily Mr Aloysius Tan is not like this if not i think he can say BYe BYe liao.. heh Good old Bones :X

Case Study 2:

My friend's friend spent a whopping $3000 on maria france slimming centre, just so she can wear nicer clothes.

Dr's Evaluation:
RIDICULOUS. Why waste that money?? somemore she's a student only lor.. tsk tsk want to diet go exercise or cut down on fatty food can le mah.. why go to that extent? the worse thing.. her bf even sponsered $700 for her to go.. but i think the bf doesnt mind her to be the chubby side but maybe it's herself who wants to be bone-like.. arrgh what the heck lor.. i mean maybe this is all GUYS' fault coz they like girls to be super slim la.. like bones lidat.. if they really like skinny girls, maybe should ask him to marry a dog bone? skinny enough le ba? hahahaha sometimes this kind of things very hard to control de leh.. u all think it's easy to be slim meh? somemore if the girl's body is like become fat very fast de.. it's not easy lor.. arrgh but some stupid guys just dont get the picture.. sigh so sad.. heh but still.. i guess we have to be happy with what we have and not to compare with others.. whether others are cuter or prettier or smarter or whatever.. BE HAPPY WITH WHAT WE HAVE is the most important.. but i think u guys reading should know right? i'm cuter and prettier than most of u MUHAHAHAHA *blush* lolz.. :P
That's all for Dr Peh's evaluation.. hehe got anything need Dr Peh's readings just TAG me.. ciaoz hehe

:(

:(

cashless

How great.. i'm only left with $198++ in my bank.. HOW RICH hahaha.. but luckily wp and jr transferred the money they owed me to me then now at least better.. it really does not feel good when your bank is like so super DRIED up la.. sigh..but not to fear.. haha on the 27th would be PAY DAY.. hahahah KA CHING!!!! $_$ and what's more.. CNY is coming and i'm gg to be a rich bitch again.. hehe so yah la.. maybe for the time being i'll have to eat bread for lunch.. haha yeps :) but i'm still fine and living.. oh yes.. madam black suggested that i blog on the zoo trip so i shall touch on it a little.. on the 14/01/2006 i went to the Zoo with dear dear and his sister and euguene and jermaine(his little niece and nephew) we reached there arnd 1+ just in time to view the animal feeding time.. yeps the trip was quite alright la.. but the weather was a bit warm.. but thinking back i shouldnt be complaining about the weather coz if not i think if it rains we wouldnt be even able to go to the Zoo lor.. so yep.. we went to watch the elephants of asian show and OMG.. i actually saw the elephants SHIT before the show started.. haha it was back facing us and euguene told me to check out the elephants "put put" woa lao the shit were gigantic and yellow in colour i wonder why.. haha they had the size of a shot put ball.. muhaha just that they were in yellow.. haha and it urinated too.. Oh man.. it was like a waterfall when it was wee wee-ing lolz but overall the trip to the zoo was quite an enjoyable one.. to end off we shared the Ben and Jerry's ice cream i think it was mint chunky chocolate or something like that but it was... H-E-A-V-E-N-L-Y hahah super duper nice but quite ex.. yeps. but i enjoyed myself very much. seeing all the animals and behaving like a small kid.. that kind of feeling is like.. wah quite "huai nian" hehe :P i've started tuition at my aunt's place le and apparently my niece and nephew arent very cooperative coz they are like very lazy during tuition no matter how much i scold them also no use.. but since i'm in need of $$$ i think better stay put.. yup. oh yes JR just to remind u again 31/01/2006 will be my last lesson at the tuition centre le until May i think when my exams end. so u better have got your relief teacher ready. yep. :) WP: i dont think i want the nike bag le.. come to think of it i think i got a lot of bags le.. i thought of a good and budget goody bag u can get for me 1) new earphones (those plug in kind not my present kind) 2)hair serum (any good brand will do.. leave in kind i dont like rinse out de) 3) xu zhi an's newest "jing xuan ji"4)$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ hahaha i think so far lidat only ba.. cant think of anything else. yep so if u guys got the budget and time can help me get these stuff ba.. haha :X that day i was pondering over a question.. "Can a guy still remain friends with his ex?" i overheard the radio deejay saying this and i started thinking.. for me, of course i wouldnt want my bf to remain good friends with his ex coz i dont think it would be possible. once romantically involved how can after that still remain as friends leh? unless either party still has some feelings for the other.. i'm not trying to say anything here but i just want to say something what i really feel.. once broken up, shouldnt remain as friends.. even if both parties had agreed that they would do so but maybe should be like just say say only and not really do it. To avoid such a thing from happening, i think the best way is not to break up lor.. i mean if the excuse is that their personality is not compatible then why get involved in the first place right? unless there's some other reasons which i cant think of la.. yep so yah lor.. hmmm.. i also dont know la just that maybe i dont really like or the guy's present gf will get jealous? haha it seems like i'm referring to myself.. lolz oh yes.. just not i was typing the url of evofus's shared blog but i accidentally typed the wrong add but i stumbled onto something BETTER.. check it out www.v-0f-us.blogpot.com i wonder if it could be some sign coz i've been having the same dream these two days that someone in my family got possessed and that some devil came and i was saying the prayer aloud that in JESUS's name all demons will go away and the marvellous thing was that in my second dream MY MUM even stretch out her hand to pray together with me to GOD. oh man.. i remembered in my dream i was very very happy.. but when i woke up and found that it was only a dream i was like a bit -_-'' but still i feel it's a sign that it's time for me to give my life to GOD. i'll still try to attend church regularly coz u guys should know la.. ok la.. i think today's entry super long already shall end here.. needa call dear dear le.. byebye :)

:)

The reef bag hui and sm bought for me broke when i only used it twice.. sigh i was really saddened about it coz my besties bought me the bag and i really really like it.. but when yesterday i took it down for repair at the ripcurl shop the stupid shop assistant say coz i dont have receipt so they cant repair for me. even if they repair for me i needa opay $30-$40+ that's daylight robbery lor.. arrgh i needa repair the bag.. :( sigh.. dont know how la.. shiti-fied.. arrgh oh yes i found a tuition job at my aunt's place that pays $300 every month which i feel that's quite good so i'm gonna stop tuition at jr's place after this month. i realise that actually i enjoy teaching there leh.. i mean the kids are quite cute in a way la.. so yepp. but still i'm gonna stop at the end of this month coz the travelling time and stuff. but if jr still wants me back.. i'll be available again after may after my exams. oh yes.. this year i'm so going to apply for NTU again.. so peeps if anyone is aware of the registration date please please please X 100000 tag me and tell me ya? thanks a million. recently nothing much has happened just the weather la.. arrgh thwarting my jogging plans everytime.. so yah la.. sigh.. Sat i'm gg Zoo with dear dear.. haha hope it wouldnt rain or we will be piggying out again le.. hahahah that's it peeps.. oh yes.. dear dear warned me not to divulge any of his pervertive ideas.. haha so i shant but this would serve as a warning if he dares to make me angry... MUHAHAHAHAH WATCH OUT!! lolz byebye *waves*

:)

Back!.. from korea hehe.. quite fun. the weather was super duper cold like -15degrees.. it's crazy lor coz i had to wear 7 layers of clothes and considering the layer of fats that i already have, i still need to wear so much u can imagine how cold it was.. haha the most happy thing in korea was that i still managed to buy a calling card and called my dearest dear dear from korea.. haha so missed hearing his piggly voice.. haha.. but still i enjoyed myself in korea.. now back in sing, sweating like a pig under the hot sun.. haha atlast, now i'm feeling better after hogging the phone with dear dear for 2 hours.. just now i was really feeling really down. when i msged dear dear he told me to go read the bible and that very moment i felt like throwing the bible away coz at that very moment i suddenly felt that what can a book do to make me feel better? but i guess i was really very very wrong to think lidat coz it aint no ordinary book. it's the BIBLE. but still at that moment i was like so helpless than he only told me to go read James 1:2 but i was like ^@*#@^%*#@ i dint want to live anymore.. but still he managed to put a smile on my face before putting down the phone. thanks dear.. thanks for making me laugh :) thanks for being there even when u were at the busiest time. yepp. *HUG* oh yes.. that stupid GU LING LING wants me to praise her in my blog but i shant waste my time on that but i just want to tell GLL that i bought her something nice from korea.. no ginseng.. haha no $$ lolz.. :P oh yes.. i almost forgot the main point of me blogging today.. actually i've got so much stuff to say but after talking to dear dear i realised that i shouldnt do it.. so i wont. :) yup feeling so hungry now coz i skipped dinner after i came back from tuition coz i was sooooo x10000000 angry and disappointed. yup with myself i guess.. and maybe someone else too. i mean sometimes we should really consider how others have been to you and that we should try to be in others shoes too. right? if you are reading this, u should know that i'm referring to you. we shouldnt do things last minute. i really hate last minute stuff coz i have to re-plan my stuff and i hate it. so please no last minute stuff okie? i'll do my part as a friend so i hope that you'll do your part as my friend too and not let me have the feeling as though u are only using me for your own benefit ya? okie? yup. we're still friends dont worry.. :)) tmr caleb's driving me to meet the rest so please just hope that it will be a safe journey.. haha Oops.. keep ya fingers crossed.. lolz bye all! i love you dear dear study hard for your tests! :)) Jia you! Jia You!

:)

I think i've found the perfect guy to marry. maybe not the cutest but definitely the kind of guy that i think would make the perfect husband. he does not really need to be rich $_$ or good looking but someone kind at heart--- seriously. today i went to the Magic of Love at Expo with jr and the tuition kids and i asked Dear dear along so that we can take care of the kids together or maybe coz i dint want to go there alone haha.. yeps. when we were gg to have dinner, the way he looked after the kids, volunteered to help them buy dinner just showed how much love he had. seriously. the kids were quite troublesome after that but he dint say any word of complaint. :)) can u believe this. i was like cursing coz the kids were very very noisy and not very cooperative i must say.. haha but still luckily i had dear dear with me. thanks dear.. u made today a very wonderful day.. *HUG*

:)

i shall touch a little on the day WE went mount faber.. haha WE walked all the way up to the top and by the time we reached WE were sweating like pigs. seriously no where near the 'r' word.. romantic that is.. i mean it's nice that WE were able to spend some time together and managed to catch a glimpse of the sun set but that's it. full stop. i dont even want to think about the juicy mosquitoes that attempt to suck OUR blood but i smack it in time haha and the 1000kg bag that i had to lunge with me when i climbed the steps up to the peak. but at last.. WE made it to the top.. haha and saw the long awaited GIGANTIC christmas tree HE saw. it's nice when night falls coz the whole tree is lighted up but when u see it in the day it's like -_-'' haha serious. but i came up with a list of things to bring when u go mount faber on foot:
1. mosquito repellant
2.FAN
3.water bottle
4.camera
5.umbrella (in case it rains)
6.$$$ (in case your legs are breaking)
yeps that's about it.. but still i enjoyed my trip to the famous Mount Faber Park.. haha :)) thanks dear oh yes, guys, i'm only gg korea on the 27th so maybe we can still meet for christmas celebration? haha and i can celebrate it with dear dear *YAHOOOOOOO* lolz oh yes.. caleb, i'm really serious about setting up a business so i only wanna rope in those really interested to discuss yeps.. got a lot creative juices bursting in my brain le.. haha.. just received a email from the school saying that we have to pay our exam fees in jan and guess how much?? it's a whopping $2000.00 WAH! so cheap arrgh i hate it man.. and i think my brain is going to burst. i cant help but feel squashed when i want to study ibm.. it's like 10 chaps in 2 months.. izit possible man?! but i'm still gonna mug hard and i know i can if i bother to put in the effort.. :)) i think it's the same for all of us.. went for hockey training twice already. it wasnt as good as i had expected coz i'm sort of rusty already so long nv play but i'm still able to hit the ball just that i get breathless haha and the guys dont really pass the ball to me coz they like to play among themselves.. or izit coz they know i'll miss the ball?! muhaha but yeps. i must continue to go jogging.. have been slacking for the past 2 weeks le and the week i'm gg korea also slack but maybe go korea can fast.. haha wonder what's for the meals la.. they had better not bring us to some chinese restaurant where i'll stuff myself silly.. haha yeps. yesterday went to meet our dearest SANA nisar.. haha aka Mrs Umair.. lolz so long nv see her le.. and apparently we were embarrassing ourselves at coffee.. i could feel the stares on us ( or izit just on me?) haha but who cares? i really had an enjoyable time yest with fishy and ah lua.. we went to town ( i so long nv go le) and went on a shopping spree! haha i bought 3/4s from mambo.. i must go on strict diet again if not the 3/4s will burst during CNY.. haha k la.. blogged long enough la.. must go call HANDSOME tan now.. haha bye peeps. miss ya all! :))

something's wrong with blogger AGAIN..

arrgh this is so 'put put'.. i think it's either blogger's problem or mine.. cant change the time leh.. anyway it's 13/12/2005 today and arnd 1130 maybe after i finish blogging it would be 1145 le ba.. yeps tmr it's officially our 3rd month together.. hehe 3 months seemed to have passed so fast but still, the thought of us getting together on 14/09/2005 just brings a smile back to my face. seriously. all those things that we have gone through together.. i must say.. it wasnt easy. from strangers turned friends and now lovers will we become family someday? haha i dont know and i want to know if we would. i dont think it will be easy but i want to try. haha sounds as if i'm gonna get married but NO! haha i'm not i'm actually married already to Jay and Daniel that is. lolz.. sigh so confirm now gg overseas le.. and i'm gonna spend christmas all alone ok, maybe together with happy family but far far far away from u my dear :( but yah la.. still i gonna try to enjoy it A-L-O-N-E. sigh we've got so many activities planned up next week.. I CANT WAIT.. I CANT CONTAIN MY EXCITMENT!!! hahahahaha.. :)) ok it's 11.43pm already and i havent finish blogging yet.. so long nv blog le but like very lazy to blog still coz just now i was typing my socio assignment.. almost went blind.. haha so disgusting.. lolz oh yes i was told by Mr Aloysius Tan to come up with my goals for the year 2006 so i think this is a few first.
Shuan's 2006 GOals to be achieved..
1. Get into NTU
2. Sit and discuss the business plan with evofus ( or izit just caleb?!)
3. Continue to go jogging regularly and DIET.. DIEt.. DIet.. Diet..diet.. hahahha :P i must.
for now, that's all ba i guess.. maybe i should come up with a christmas wishlist too? haha
1. spend it with dear2 (not possible anymore) this was the first thing on my mind, seriously :(
2. ******meaningful gifts******
3.my grey nike bag
4.some nice clothes
5.more $$$$$ " please santa.. cant u see my waving at you??" haha
yah la.. that's all i guess i dont think it's a lot right? lolz ciao ppl 7 more mins before the clock strikes 12 and it's 14-12-2005.. 6..5..4..3..2..1.. *jiang jiang jiang jiaaaaaannnnngggg* hahahah

:(

Ok. it's final. I'm gg korea and hong kong from 25th-31st.. and i'm not feeling excited simply because i cant spend the first Christmas together with dear dear.. sigh.. what the heck. :(

mixed feelings

Yest went for the asian television awards saw the MEN of my dreams.. ALLAN WU, ZHEN JIA YING AND TIN CHOKKAMOLKJI ! oh man.. i was yelling like a mad woman there when i saw all the hunks.. haha oh yes if u have a hard time deciphering the thai guy's name i'll pronounce it for u next time.. haha oh yes i'll update our pic some time later.. haha i was sooo excited that i couldnt sleep last night.. haha oh yes have to keep this entry short coz i'm busy chatting now.. yeps. bye babes and dudes~~~~

:(

What's wrong with me? I need to learn how to control my temper. When two people are together, they really need lots of patience and be accomodating. But i think i lack of both. Sorry i'm just pissed. Leave me Alone. :(

:)

Arrgh just now the post that i typed halfway was deleted.. @Q&^@@#^%$@#!^& yeps so i have to start all over again.. so i met dear dear at holland today for dinner at SUBWAY (slurpz) and we were early so we decided to walk around first before eating. just when we crossed the road, we saw this super duper old man pushing a suspiciously-looking-like cold-storage trolley and he was like so super frail. dont know why suddenly i turned over to him and ask him (as in dear dear not the old man yep) if we should help him.. he had his address printed on a piece of paper stuck to the trolley so initially we wanted to just help him across the road coz he said he wanted to go home but if we just left him at the traffic light there like super evil so end up we send him right back to his home. my heart just went out to him lor i mean he is so old and frail and living all alone. sigh i wonder if i'll be lidat when i grow old already.. all alone and waiting to die in a one room flat. the living condition isn't good and it was my first time doing such stuff.. sigh i really pity him. so i was telling dear dear if we should engage in some sort of volunteer work together? i mean we can do meaningful stuff together and most importantly, spend time together? haha one stone kill 2 birds.. but the both of us must have the time and commitment first? lolz we left H.V early coz i tot i could come home and eat my econs notes but apparently my heart fly away already and i'm feeling lazy to study. maybe now i should get going? yeps. i should. ciao peeps. :))

what's my purpose in life?

Today i was on board 970 on my way to dearie's place then suddenly this thought struck me. " why are we born when we have to die eventually?" then i tot that i had actually read this book " the purpose-driven life" but the thing is that i hadnt found the purpose in my life,that is. And i know that the only way i will know why the heck i was born is through accepting Christ but the time is still not ripe yet. seriously. i know many of my friends out there are hoping that i've already accepted Christ but Queen.. yeps u should know la. Some of the ppl out there also tell me that i shouldnt let my mum be the deciding factor of me accepting Christ but i really lack the courage to face the music when she knows that i've accepted Christ.. i think she'll kill me and she will not let me go out ANYMORE.. that's the end man.. seriously. So now i think the best solution for me is to wait till i'm 21 when i'm an adult already and i'll make this important decision promptly. :)) i guess this is not a wise decision to make coz i shouldnt put this issue off anymore but i guess it's the best for the time being and i hope u peeps will understand too. so i was thinking about all this on board 970 then i saw this european lady carrying a cambodia looking kid. i guess she has adopted him? then i tot of how fortunate i am to be born in singapore where i'm given good food and education so i was thinking again if i should adopt a kid next time. True i may have my own kids(hopefully) but i may still want to adopt another not-so-fortunate- kid and let s/he have the privilege the other kids in his/her country dont? haha think what i'm blogging today a bit profound. but yah la this is all what i think from the bottom of my heart. :)) Today's IBM class was quite alright.. boring though but i actually laughed at DOM's lame jokes.. he was practically reading all the stuff from the notes and making weird noises hoping to catch our attention and he is really DOM lor.. he was like telling all the skimpily-dressed girls who came like so damn late to walk down the stairs slowly and not to fall down me and vivien were like -_-'' .. sucks man. woa lao so tiko.. and it's super obvious that he's bias against those who dress normally like me and vivien and will give extra care to those that wear skimpily and show off their ASSETS. damns but aiyah i dont care also.. haha i'm in school for a purpose.. not to fashion parade. haha.. yeps. k la blogged long enough for today already. Prince is back and IMMEDIATELY needs to hog the com so i have to "xiam" already.. haha bye peeps~ outta here :))))))

:/

This is getting bad.. i'm supposed to be studying for socio test tmr but my heart is not there.. shucks man.. i was doing well in the morning but i decided to give myself a break and so i was reading my diary which i used to keep from sec 3- sec 4 and after that i slacked already.. i really must pia later.. cannot slack anymore *slap myself* shit man.. i'm like so distracted over what? i also dont know la.. but just that my mind wondering off when i'm studying and i cant really absorb the stuff also. partly i think coz it's just super DRY and BORING. yep so yah la i must force myself to stay focused and after tmr everything would be back to normal.. yep. fri i'm gg for an encounter camp till sun hope i would gain an insight and yep. it's BACK to the books again! i miss u dear dear.. :/

:(

Dear dear.. i'm so sorry that such a terrible thing had to happen. U must be strong ya.. for the time being let's put all our plans aside first. Wait till everything is settled le then we discuss again okie? I will always be by you if u need anything yepp? Just want to let u know that i care ya.. Take care and I love you :))

(:

Oh man.. i got my long awaited wish come true today. Not to get into NTU but to teach at pei hwa primary.. all the squeeky high pitched voices---> made me have headache but i simply enjoyed myself.. tmr during DOM's break time, pei hwa called me up and asked me if i could go down for class to relief for pri 1 and 2 class.. i dint want to miss another chance so i decided to go for it! yeps.. haha.. i was so excited that i finally had a chance to do down there to teach.. i was waiting to see all the chubby faces and i wasnt disappointed.. haha just that i dint get to pinch their faces.. haha if not wait i kena complained then can say BYEBYE le.. haha so yeps i relief-ed from 12-630 and after that i was like super shagged le but still had to meet jr and tay at city hall to discuss tuition stuff.. my head was throbbing like mad le but i felt better just by being in company with them. yeps. but still it's still hurting and it's all from the squeeky kids.. they are really super cute " teacher, teacher, can i drink water?'', " teacher, teacher, can i go toilet?", "teacher,teacher, can i go over to my friend's table?" haha so cute.. all these small little acts really reflected their innocence and how much i really love them.. haha i think this is the best present i received this year besides the WONDERFUL card dearie made. yeps haha i just took 2 panadol to suppress the headache but apparently it's not getting any better coz my head is still throbbing arrgh! sigh.. MON! haha our 2nd month and i got relief classes too.. muhahha $_$ so happy.. cant wait for mon to come. yep yep that's all peeps.. i feeling a little stoned already... Bye~~~~~~~~~

woW~

*sings* Happy birthday to me.. Happy birthday to me.. Happy birthday to Royal Meeeeee... Happy birthday tooooo Meeeeeeee *applause*
haha think i'm not so alright.. anyways yest i celebrated my ROyal 19th birthday and it would be the last year i can count my age starting with number '1'.. sigh next year will be 20 le.. getting real OLD.. haha yeps yeps but i think this year's celebration was the BEST i ever had.. haha because of my royalty *shy*, celebration for princess peh's birthday actually started on the 2nd of Nov.. haha i went to meet dearie for dinner at Fish and Co..(the glass house as vivien calls it) yeps and he bought me a bouquet of Daisies.. haha so nice.. i thought that was the end and he also bought me a care bear(the one with the four leaf clover on the stomach de) and famous amos.. (slurpz) that's not the HIGHLIGHT.. haha the highlight was the card he made.. oh man.. it's really SUPER DUPER nice.. i was so super touched by it.. he used little bulbs to make a heart shape and it was connected to batteries so when i on it the heart would light up.. oh man.. i cant believe he could actually do it. So proud of him!!!!! and so proud of myself to have such a BOYFRIEND.. haha tsk..tsk.. peeps reading this must be so jealous of me.. *shy* haha if got chance ask me to show u the MASTERPIECE.. lolz.. it's really B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L!!!!!!!! haha.. yeps so we headed home after that and i washed up.. least did i expect evofus + kelvin were ambushing at west mall already waiting for me to come home and gave me a surprise! haha they were all at my place when i was watching my Jay Chou's MTV.. lolz i was really really surprised and touched too.. haha but the sad thing was that they only stayed on for a while and we dint really have a good chance to chat about stuff.. yeps got lots to share but NO!!!! time.. arrgh.. haha they left at about 1230 and i cleared up and zzzz.. haha the next morning.. i was awaken by dearie's phone call and he called at around 9.30 and i was shocked coz i slept so well that i dint realise that it was so late already and we were meeting at clementi at 11 to go picniking at West Coast.. haha i've never gone picniking before.. maybe except cum sun tanning but yest we were like intensive picniking.. ok. whatever -_-'' the weather was super good.. not very sunny but it started to drizzle a little but it couldnt dampen our mood.. haha dearie bought me a slice of BLACK FOREST CAKE (are u reading this TAY?!) haha but i think the cream melted under the intense heat and it was quite sick but still.. Greedy me ate the cake.. haha yeps there were many ppl flying kites.. and were.. hmmm CoOL but we dint know how to fly a kite so we played frisbee instead.. haha it was quite a day.. luckily we brought lots of fruits or else i think we would have died of dehydration.. lolz i went home around 5+ coz at night i had BBQ with the Royal family mah.. lolz we ate and ate and ate just like PIGS.. lolz *snort* finally got to rest at around 9+ almost died.. what a hectic day.. today is not good too.. i had IBM class in the morning then at night i have socio from 6-930 @_@ maybe i'll fall asleep in the lect.. sigh.. but miraculously i paid attention in class today.. haha i knew what DOM was talking about and maybe i did laugh at some of his lame jokes... haha yeps so now i'm one year older i must be more Matured.. haha lolz.. that's all folks got any other stuff when we meet up i'll update ya okie? take care peeps! Miss u all :))

I really feel very blessed when i have my friends with me. serious.. all my peeps reading this.. some of u guys messaged me and asked me what i want for my ROYAL birthday but i told your that i dont know what i want.. and apparently the first response that you guys gave me was to ask me not to act shy.. but P-L-E-A-S-E since when has Shuan Shuan will act shy one?? lolz.. yeps so i really mean it when i said that i dont know what i want okie.. hehe $_$ maybe cold hard cash? hehe.. what i really want is some time for us to gather, sit around the talk. since we have not been doing that for a long long long long time le.. :)) alright? Also, what i wanted most in my life.. my dearie.. is there for me.. what more can i ask for? haha but i still welcome MONEY$$$$$.. lolz haha i just read a email from my friend i guess it's really true.. "You cant make someone love you. All you can do is to be someone who can be loved,the rest is up to the person to realise your worth." woW it's like so inspirational.. lolz gotta go.. dearie just called to say that his class is cancelled so we're going out.. WoO hoO! byebye :P

:))

long long time never blog le.. i'm really lazy these days.. please forgive me my loyal readers (that is if i have any) yeps.. today's officially the last day of my tuition!!! wahaha finally all the torture is over.. but i guess maybe i'm gg to miss it just a little.. hehe oh yes.. something to mention.. just now dearie gave me a BIG surprise.. and the surprise is HIM.. hehe apparently i called him after jogging and he was already at my house the bus stop but he lied! he said he gg to buy something for his sis.. then when i left my place for tuition he suddenly appeared from nowhere and surprised me and send me to tuition.. i felt quite bad la coz he came all the way down from home and he bought me kinder surprise also.. tee hee but we only spend like 10 mins together? arrgh but the surprise was.. Heart warming.. really it brought a smile to my face and i suddenly felt that tuition wasnt that bad afterall.. haha :)) thanks dear dear i really appreciate that.. heez.. oh yes.. evofus when u guys want a gathering huh?? keep me updated if any ya? i miss u guys..

:))

Long long time never had chance to blog already coz handsome PRINCE is always hogging the com playing his games even when he's having exams.. i wonder if he'll do well and if he do well i think he is really God. serious.. hai WTH today's sociology class was alright only only managed to adsorb like maybe say 70% of what she taught and i got back my test paper.. wasnt as good as i had anticipated la.. i only got 19.5/30 but the passing grade is like 11/30 but still meiqi got 24/30!!!! oh man and she's the highest in the whole lect.. can u believe it?? haha maybe i'm lazy la that's why.. oh yeah yest caught european giggolo with dearie and it was quite funny.. i felt quite bad coz dearie wasnt feeling well and kept coughing but BAD me had wanted to go watch the movie.. hai sorry dear and the worse thing he had to send me home :( something embarrassing happened in the theatre though.. haha at the starting of the show.. A couple came and started looking for their seats..
US: -stares-
Me: i was thinking to myself coz beside had only 1 seat left
Them: excuse me i think you guys are sitting at our place?
Act smart Me: Are u sure? this is G20 RIGHT?
Them:NO?! This is C20!!!!!!
US: Sorry Sorry..
So we stood up and went to look for G20 hai.. when we almost settled down..
He: Did u take the drink??
Me: Shit! It's still there.. -_-''
We just cant watch in peace. but the remaining part of the show was rather peaceful la.. the show was rather R-rated.. haha though it's written M-18 haha maybe i'm not open-minded enough.. yawn so sian just got back from jogging havent even bathe yet and later i still got tuition.. arrgh i dread going for tuition now.. it's so SHIT. i dont know la.. but i practically drag myself to tuition week after week.. maybe i should get an attachment somewhere part time de and not so sian.. i cannot stand it.. that girl show me attitude for a spastic $170 i have to tolerate all her nonsense! hai see how ba.. everything else is going well for me at least for the time being and i thank GOD for that.. the fever's gone but i'm having slight flu but that's no big deal also.. haha i get flu every now and then~ thanks all for ya concern. i'm back to my health le so can continue my intensive exercise.. haha but my toe huh.. tsk..tskk. Ouch! :/ haha next week gotta go down queensway get new sports shoe and my long awaited Jay Chou's inspired blouse! haha so nice.. hopefully i can fit in.. lolz that's all folks.. byebye :))

i'm so upset :(

sad..sad..sad.. so sad and disappointed with myself.. WHY? why must i be plagued by this fever bug? i cant go anywhere.. have to stay at home and worse of all.. cant spend time with Dearie.. i'm feeling really upset. shit. just came back from the doc again.. i've been there 4 times already for the past week.. arrgh and the freaking fever just wont subside.. just now at the doc my fever hit the highest dot 38.9 WOO HOO! and i was like shivering the clinic but now back home i'm fine already leh.. i want to get well.. really! i stayed at home the whole of today hoping to have more rest so tmr can go out but in the end? still the same! then at least i should have gone out today so that arrgh.. i dont know also la.. i think everyone's sick and tired of me telling them that i'm still having fever and boring everyone with my long grandmother stories. my plans for tmr and fri all thwarted! !@#%^*%$ i'm really upset now. serious. why cant we be like other couples go out watch movie, shop, eat,chill and spend time together?? all i can do is rest at home and u come over visit me for a few hours. this is not the courtship both of us wanted right? haiz i dont know.. :X i dont know if u have made the right choice choosing to be with me coz i dont know if i can be the girlfriend that u want and it's like ever since we got together we never really go chill le.. maybe partly coz of my fever la.. but haiz.. whatever it is i just hope that all this shit will be over soon.. i'm very sick of fighting this fever and i'm sure u are sick of me telling u all the shit i have to go through also.. fri would be the lst month we are together ler.. supposedly going out to have celebration but now the situation looks gloomy and this is B-A-D. real bad. i dont want to think about it ler.. i want to cry! arrgh i'm so disappointed with myself. damns. is this retribution? let me think about it. -_-''

today is the last day ler..

Hi all, i went to the doc again today afternoon coz i was still running a fever.. it was 38.0 when the doc measured me but my body dint feel hot. i was expecting a blood test today but he dint give me one, instead, he gave me an injection! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOouch!!!!!!! it's been a million years ago since i got an injection.. haha--> on my butt somemore.. woa lao made my bootie feel so sore for like a few hours.. he said that if the fever is still there tmr morning then i really have to go back do blood test and the situation seems to be that IT'S REALLY DENGUE :-X my temp has been fluctuating and i was still so hopeful yesterday that my temp has gone down to 36.7 or whatever it is.. arrgh.. hope that freaking mosquito which had bitten has already gotten smashed by someone or at least have died of diabetes coz i'm too sweet.. *shy* haha.. i've been staying at home for the past 2 days and the !@#$%^ fever still hasnt gone away.. i've been drinking a lot of water and resting A LOT. almost like a pig liao.. *snort* i'm so afraid that i cant catch up with my schoolwork too.. hai.. hope i'll be fine tmr coz today is really the last day for the fever to go away ler.. i feel very cooling now but who knows?! May God have mercy on me :)) Outta here~

close brush with death..

:/ my high fever for 4 days has finally subsided or izit i had thought so only?? just now i measured my temp and it was 36.7.. hopefully it will stay the way it is.. just now i was taking afternoon nap coz i ate the fever medicine and Queen came to check on me and asked me why my whole body was feeling so cold. but i was sweating like mad.. my whole shirt was drenched in sweat leh.. then i woke up feeling cold?! arrgh my body's like becoming hot and cold, hot and later cold again.. last night i was lying on bed when suddenly i had chest pain. it was like having a thousand needles poking into my chest and i was so scared that i cried. i was so scared that the next morning i wouldnt be able to wake up.. and i would just die in my sleep. :(( the kind of fear is no one would understand unless he or she has gone through it before.. i was so scared that i called Dearie and was talking to him and crying at the same time.. guess i really scared him but i felt so helpless at that time and Queen was like couldnt really be bothered with me.. coz she tot i was faking sickness.. but why would i want to do that? hai i dont know la i just want to get well and get out of the ''we can take of each other'' relationship. Dear Dear u should know right.. hehe that's all la OUtta Here~ To all: please pray for my recovery :)) Thankies

check this out!

What are the signs and symptoms of dengue fever and dengue hemorrhagic fever?

Dengue fever usually starts suddenly with a high fever, rash, severe headache, pain behind the eyes, and muscle and joint pain. The severity of the joint pain has given dengue the name "breakbone fever." Nausea, vomiting, and loss of appetite are common. A rash usually appears 3 to 4 days after the start of the fever. The illness can last up to 10 days, but complete recovery can take as long as a month. Older children and adults are usually sicker than young children.

Most dengue infections result in relatively mild illness, but some can progress to dengue hemorrhagic fever. With dengue hemorrhagic fever, the blood vessels start to leak and cause bleeding from the nose, mouth, and gums. Bruising can be a sign of bleeding inside the body. Without prompt treatment, the blood vessels can collapse, causing shock (dengue shock syndrome). Dengue hemorrhagic fever is fatal in about 5 percent of cases, mostly among children and young adults.---> i dont want to die this way.. :((

BLOGGER's back!

haha finally.. i can type normally ler.. blogger's back.. hehe but i'm sick.. oh man.. and there's a possibility that it's dengue.. FREAK. oh man.. i'm having a fever 38.2 and body ache but surprisingly no FLU.. *cries* how sia.. what if it's really dengue?? argh.. but Dearie was sweet enough.. he had chalet till today and he rushed down straight after checking out, to SIM to pick me up from school then we had lunch at bukit timah market before heading back home. by the time i reached home, my fever was already 38.1.. *applause* how cool.. and the worse thing? i dont feel weak leh.. just that my face and body sometimes cold and then hot again.. :( after chilling at my place for a while dearie suggested that i should really go see a doctor coz my fever was like not subsiding.. so we took a bus now to see the doc and the doc couldnt even prescribe anything.. he said we have to monitor and see if the temperature drops after 3 days or more if not IT'S REALLY DENGUE.. initially i was still joking around that it would be dengue but now.. seriously i'm scared. i'm so scared of dying, losing my loved ones forever.. one of the symptoms of dengue is bone pain and the 'GOOD' news, my left ankle hurts now.. i dont know leh.. i'm so so so scared of kena-ing dengue.. what if i die in the hospital? i cant bear to leave my family and friends and most importantly DEARIE.. *boo hoo* :(( i was sponging myself just now while resting hoping that the temp would at least drop to 37. something.. but it dint it went down to 38.0 how nice.. peeps if i really die. get me a purple coffin. i dont wanna look on the dark side but there's is this possibility right? but maybe u guys could PRAY really hard for my recovery? just want to make a note here.. Dearie.. thanks for everything today.. thanks for feeling tired because of me, thanks for rushing down and being worried for me. i will take care of myself. This is the first time i'm sick and feel so cared for. All the credit goes to you! :)) hehe yeps.. thats all.. love ya Dearie :*

:(

i dont know.. maybe it's just me.. i dint mean to make u worry but when i couldnt reach somebody on their mobile i would be pissed. really. fine u told me that u went swimming and so i couldnt reach u i should be understanding and u are at the chalet enjoying yourself and i shouldnt be disturbing u.. right?? i tried to put myself in your shoes so i know.. but somehow this time i find it rather difficult for me to do so.. :( just now i was so sick (i dont know the reason for it) and i so much wanted to talk to u but u just werent there for me. i think i'm just being unreasonable. leave me alone. now i realise that i'm not such a easy person to be with. *sigh* feeling so sick yet still have to go for tuition later. it's not easy to do all these alone and i want and need u to be there for me.. Will you?

argh..

blogger is still down for my com.. damns whats wrong sia.. today's wed which means no school day for me so i slept till 10 in the morning.. hehe later meeting fishy to go holland to chill and chat up a bit. havent been meeting up with sm for a long long long long time ler. this sun we arrange to go for the hockey training together, hopefully nothing goes wrong and we can go for it.. argh. been postponing it for many many weeks liao.. lost touch of playing also.. i did 4km yesterday and my whole body was aching like siao but today feeling better already.. yeps.. on friday gonna meet up with the JJ peeps and bringing dearie along.. haha and apparently i got teased by them.. haha but nvm next time when it's their turn, they're gonna get it! haha.. that's all for today.. nothing much to blog also.. outta here~

what's wrong??

i really think that there is something wrong with blogger.. what the heck!!!! i cant change the colour of the text and the space to type is like so freaking small.. argh shant rabble on on that.. hehe.. today went out with Dearie on our first official date to TOWN! haha.. BUDGET date.. tee hee.. we went Marche at first for lunch coz i was craving for SAMBAL STINGRAY.. haha then we ordered rosti, pizza and crepes.. so much for the two of us but *burp* we managed to finish everything.. tsk..tsk.. must go jog more liao.. lolz yeps then after that we hang around heeren for a while i went to get my hairbands and we decided to proceed on with the journey to go check out squash rackets.. but i wanted to drop by paragon first to shop around.. then when we were about to leave, it started raining.. and that started off our BUDGET time out.. lolz i suggested going to the basement level of paragon coz Dearie was feeling thirsty so i was thinking maybe we can go get drinks downstairs.. he wanted to get some juice from starbucks but Cheapskate me decided that we should just go to the liberty market or whatever supermarket that was, to get cheapo drinks. hehe after that we decided to go use the kodak machine that can print pictures de so print out the pics we took earlier on and we printed.. and printed.. and printed.. and printed.. altogether we spent $5 on printed the same picture.. haiz just that it's of different frames and sizes.. haha but it was fun and just that my legs ache now.. lolz we spent around an hour just printing those pics and giggling like small kids but i had a lot of fun. really.. haha :)) after spending an hour or so in front of the machine, the rain finally stopped.. haha so we decided to go taka and check out the rackets at stadium after checking out finding them TOO EXPENSIVE, haha we went to the basement level (again!) of taka and Cheapo me suggested go test out the free stuff behind.. haha how greedy and cheapskate.. but it was fun. really i so long nv go chill out with him le so this was like WOW! haha yeps.. though my legs are aching now.. i also dont know why..for ppl who can run 4km, legs also wont break but shop whole day legs want to break liao.. oh yes another point i want to make.. at TAKA there, there's this "mei wu" shop that sells all kinds of preserved fruits but dont ever go there and buy raisins.. i got cheated man *sniff* there's another stall further up that sells the same stuff for a cheaper price for MORE too!!!!! argh felt so heart pain when i knew i got cheated coz the $$ i'm spending now is what i've earned de leh.. Queen also never give me $$ lor.. haiz yeps yeps. i shant let this kill my happy mood.. lolz that's all folks.. OUTTA HERE~ peace.

blogger looks suspiciously virus-fied

haha.. long time since i blogged then when i'm here.. the posting section looks suspiciously virus-fied.. lolz this few days havent got time to blog coz busy studying for socio test TODAY.. hehe the test was quite alright la.. i managed to do hopefully can pass.. heh.. yeps.. today's also the last day of Dearie's exams.. finally we can go out and CHILL.. sooooo long never go town ler.. my buying list is getting longer.. haha rights.. nothing much that's all for now maybe i'll be back again tonight.. OUTTA HERE~
P.S Indeed it is virus-fied.. i cant change the freaking colour of the text.. :((

tiring day..

Today i had IBM class and it was quite a miracle that i actually listened in class.. and PAID ATTENTION to what DOM had to say (btw DOM = Dirty old man) haha so i was paying attention.. maybe it's the power of love.. haha not for DOM la.. heh.. U should know who huh.. yeps yeps. so today's lect was good. After school i came home went downstairs to swim and the water was icy cold even though the sun was very sunny.. WTH.. hehe after that actually wanted to revise de but i was too hungry and tired to do anything.. i only had delicious raisins for lunch. how nice :(( dinner i ate at sakae sushi with evofus but dinner was good. think i'll have nightmare tonight.. still feeling full.. hehe.. but NICE~ slurpz.. just now was on the phone with Dearie and he was feeling so excited about the planes and stuff and he was telling me but i dont really understand what he is talking about.. :(( so sad.. maybe i'm a little slow and retarded.. yah la but i'll try to understand okie.. i enjoy listening to u sharing your stuff with me. really. yeps. that's all for today.. OUTTA HERE` miss yer

bo liao

Your Personality Profile

You are pure, moral, and adaptable.You tend to blend into your surroundings.Shy on the outside, you're outspoken to your friends. You believe that you live a virtuous life...And you tend to judge others with a harsh eye.As a result, people tend to crave your approval.

The World's Shortest Personality Test

I just love to do these TESTS.. haha

check this out

How You Are In Love

You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time. You give and take equally in relationships. You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time. You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change. You are fickle and tend to fall out of love easily. You bounce from romance to romance.

How Are You In Love?

You Are 30% Boyish and 70% Girlish

Even if you're not a girl, you're very feminine.You're in touch with your feelings, and your heart rules you.A bit of a emotional roller coaster, one moment you're up and the next you're down.But no matter what, you try to be as cute and perky as possible.

How Boyish or Girlish Are You?

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart. In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you. You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change. You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please. Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage. In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

heya

Peeps.. u guys can now tag me. haha.. leave me a message ya. take care~

i miss you..

Today's Econs class was terrible.. i wasnt really distracted but i could not really focus in class.. so ended up i dint really listen to what the lecturer was explaining.. gotta go do some reading up later on.. haiz.. I miss you leh.. even worse everytime after we talk on the phone.. haiz coz it's like so near yet so far.. u know that kind of feelings? hmm... but i think it's okay la.. we may be physically apart but what matters most is that we are mentally together. Easy to say, Difficult to Do.. yeps just a short one today.. Christina coming over to ask Hairdresser Peh to help her Dye her hair.. haha.. Outta here~ miss yer

:))

It's been only 3 days since i last blogged.. and i feel that it's like quite long huh.. haha yeps.. now too "xing fu" already become very lazy to blog but for the sake of my loyal readers i will blog.. YEs i will.. haa.. today went to school for Maths.. quite alright la.. i mean partial differentiation and stuff.. they may be new stuff but at least i'm learning something not like in IBM class dont even know what the idoit lecturer is talking about.. And !!!!!!! Dearie can help this Maths "pro" with my maths.. guess i'm not such a qualitative person.. not quantitative also.. damns. i'm nowhere. hah.. but nvm la.. i think sooner or later i will find something that i'm good in.. maybe CHINESE?! haha but come to think of it i would rather do chinese, something that i'm good in rather that writing CHIME stuff for sociology and IBM. gosh but do i have a choice? haha.. oh yes.. Dearie, dont worry about not spending enough time with me coz i really dont mind since u are having exams now right? i dont wanna affect your study momentum.. IF not i'll expose u.. haha your 2 Weird but cute things.. YOu should know what right? heh.. next time can blackmail u ar.. muhaha! yeps.. that's all la a short one today.. the weather is making feel like a pig so cold and cosy.. hehe gg to take a short nap before going to Jog with Vivien later and TUITION tonight.. argh` I Love You Dearie.. :-*

:))

Went for JJ's mid-autumn festival today.. wasnt as good as what i had expected.. as in like no other peeps bothered to go back except evofus + kelvin. yeps. haha but we dint do much also there.. partly i had to leave early to meet Dearie.. then go there we only chit chat for a while, ate the durian moon cake until super full and played some very very very exciting game that got me so scared.. haha yeps after that met Dearie at westmall for dinner.. and.. tsk..tsk.. YOU tricked me.. heh guess i was really dumb not to realise that in the plastic bag was a flower.. and i was quite sad when YOU sent me away to buy YOU the hair wax.. but nevertheless, i still love YOU very very very much. :)) hehe.. YOU must work hard for your exams okie.. Jia you! Jia you! sometimes i wished that what i am studying has got some relevance to what you're doing then at least we can discuss YOU know.. hehe.. but nvm.. i give YOU moral support alright.. heh.. oh yes, i was telling YOU about my heart being very pain as in "xing tong" whenever i'm in lecture coz why? i was thinking about YOU :(( or maybe just because i have a weak heart.. haha dont know la but the feelings is like my heart kena squashed lidat and very pain but the pain is like only for a short while only lei.. But it comes everytime i think of YOU or when i miss YOU. maybe i'm sick.. haiz dont know la.. but for now i know i shouldnt think so much. just be your girlfriend wholeheartedly and love YOU like i love myself. heh yeps that's all. i'm feeling tired already.. going to bed soon. I love you Aloy~

love is definitely in the AIR!

heya guys.. dint realise that my previous entries were very depressing.. lolz but i'm happy la. serious. Now that i have him. :) Thanks Aloysius. i love u lots. muack*

:/

Feel that my heart is weighing me down.. Today's Wed which means no school day but i feel so weighed down dont know about what also.. haiz.. this morning, Pei Hwa Pri called me up to do relief teaching and today they wanted me down.. it has always been my Dream to go there to teach coz i know a few little kiddies there from Kumon how i miss them.. but i dint go down coz of YOU. yes YOU. again. by this time u should know very well who u are.. maybe u will think that u dint ask me to go down today and it's that i myself want to go see you.. yah la when i heard that you were sick i had this sick feeling in my stomach.. haha felt like puking also.. :P somemore u told me u feeling giddy and want puke cannot puke.. i've gone through that and i know how sick it feels lor.. so yep yep this time i'm using my heart not my mind to think ler.. so i made up my mind to reject Pei Hwa when the lady called me.. haiz hope this hasnt been a wrong decision coz can u imagine the amount of $$$$$$$$$$ i can earn when i go down? haha until next tues lor.. it's like 5 days X $65 = $325 ka ching! ka CHing! $_$ haha after i've calculated a bit regretful now.. but it's ok la.. to me, you are more important.. heh.. money only mah, can always earn them again right? hehe.. :) yesterday i slacked the whole day.. sucks.. i blogged saying that i wanted to go revise econs and i dint.. this morning also.. woke up and practised the piano for one and a half hour then slacked.watch tv, come online.. i know i shouldnt be doing all this but somehow i cant help it leh.. no motivation to study.. all my NTU peeps are busy with projects when it's their holiday.. so sian also.. OK i make up my mind liao.. tonight i must surely MUG. I must, I HAVE TO! argh.. but my heart is not there la.. everytime i'm reading the notes i feel that i'm just reading the english sentence and not really understanding the meaning i'm supposed to understand. damns ashamed to say, when reading the bible also! yesterday was still quite ok.. the day before was terrible.. and i even had to close it halfway to prepare my heart for GOD. how sinful can i be. *slap myself* haiz sometimes i worry if i'm suffering from amnesia or what lei.. i keep forgetting stuff leh.. simple stuff like taking what bus to valley point i can also keep forgetting.. not say i'm doing it on purpose but i really cannot remember.. yesterday also.. i took out a shirt from the cupboard wanting to change into it.. then suddenly i forgot where i put it ler.. End up i dint even take it out from the cupboard?! oh man.. is this some kind of symptoms? haiz not once liao lor.. but repetitive incidents. and it really sp00ks me.. izit coz i havent been paying much attention when i'm doing that thing that's why i seem so distracted or izit Illness? haiz.. dont know la.. tonight meeting JAs to get my durian mooncakes! SLURRpz.. greedy me.. lolz.. today is indeed rest day for me.. had been exercising for the past few days and my leg muscles are aching.. haha dont know why leh.. quite weird but thurs going to jog with vivien again.. Now, i'm troubled by something. SM wants to go for tornadoes hockey club training on SUn. but Sun usually i go for service.. but if she goes for training on Sun this would mean that no one would accompany me to training on SAt and i'll be the only GIRL there.. i dont want that.. so actually i've come up with a plan. maybe TT u should take over my P5 class on Sat then i can go service with JR until 7 then i rush down for tuition?? how? this is what i think only.. nothing's been confirmed yet. actually i would prefer to go down for training on SAt but come to think of it.. it seems like the weather likes to rain on SAt afternoon then SUn morning the weather is always Good. :) how? Aloysius said that i should put GOD in priority. Yes but if i go for service on Sat i'm also doing it right? Or am i not.. and i shouldnt go find another church to attend if not i'll be church-hopping.. but coz FCBC gonna move to EXpO in december.. haiz i enjoy listening to the Pastors Preaching but the fact that i have to travel so far.. it's not worth the time.. at least this is what i feel.. haiz dont know la.. so many things waiting for me to make decisions and so little memory for me to tap on. what the heck. :(

is LOVE in the air?

Getting lazier and lazier these days.. i mean in the case of blogging.. haha many things wanna share but just too lazy to come blog.. haha today's econs class was fabulous.. i actually understood every single thing the lecturer explained for WHOLE THREE hours.. and i had secretly hoped that the lecturer wouldnt end so soon coz i dint really want to break the study momentum lei.. haha but all good things would come to an end.. lolz yep yep later i must go back and revise again if not wait forget what he taught then i can GTH already.. haha yep yep.. it's very RARE that i can pay attention for the whole 3 hours lor.. like last week for example, i was dozing off la so tired that i couldnt pay attention. so what aloysius said is true. if i had came online yesterday i would be very tired and today go school sure shag de but i was reading mag and the bible till 1230 last night but this morning wake up still feeling fresh.. as in like dont have that kind of dreading to come school feeling.. :)) haha izit because of last night? u know? lolz.. but it was a magical night. serious. thanks man. :) so i came back from school, had lunch with viven and sian lye at bukit timah market had my all-time favourite FISH SOUP.. haha slurpz. very nice.. haha then i came home to swim and BLOG haha finally.. this whole week gonna be real busy.. everyday is PACKED.. PACKED..PACKED.. gatherings, meetings, everything is just so endless and awaiting for me to accomplish.. haiz but i rather lead a busy life then to waste my time away.. isnt it?? hmm.. hehe Friday going back to JJ for Mooncake Festival celebration.. hope it would be nice and not eyeball-rolling session.. haha dont think so since evofus will be there! haha alrights la.. i shall stop here ler.. love ya guys~

finally`

Finally!!!!! the intensive camp is over.. haha after such long preparations and stuff.. all the compilation of notes and all the endless meetings.. finally.. say BYEBYE.. :P haha but i really wonder if jr is still going to do back the same stuff AGAIN next year.. lolz.. but i enjoyed myself la.. hehe today i actually screamed at the top of my voice at kenneth. and he still got the cheek to say "Miss Peh, why u so fierce huh" i was like -.-'' if i'm not fierce how they heck can the rest hear me when he was talking at the top of his lungs?! damns. but yah la we played games towards the end of the class and i guess the kids and myself did enjoyed ourselves.. haha finally everything is over. and.. and.. this gives me more time to think of HIM. when he is not. haiz.. i also dont know la.. was talking to Jas a few days ago and she concluded for me that YES. he just wants to be friends. how nice. though it is the truth. it hurts u know.. and i'm feeling real hurt now. u know that kind of feelings where he makes u feel real loved and cared for and suddenly,everything's just gone. why? if u had intended to make me feel hurt. u have gotten what u desired.. but i think u are not that evil anyway but really.thanks. u've hurt me. not u la Jas.. dont be confused.. lolz haha.. thanks for telling me the truth.i need the truth to wake myself up. thanks for waking me up so i wont be living in my fantasy world. haha. thanks for opening my heart and mind to other guys.. (like as if i am) muhaha u asked if we(as in me and him) want to bring our relationship to another level but u know this kind of thing, one hand cannot clap know.. haiz really la.. i should just leave all this in God's hands. i really dont know what i can do and what i should do. should i just leave everything as it is? but it's really eating me up and i hate this kind of feeling.. haiz dont know la.. anyways went swimming alone today.. downstairs only mah.. vivien actually wanted to come over to study de but i woke up at 11 and called her then she said she gg over to library to zap econs notes and what the heck was i sleeping at home? haha aiyah.. but at least.. i finished my sociology assignment.. woa lao i did that so like so damn long lor.. but like never ending de leh.. but *phew* managed to do it all today. at least one thing to be happy about. tmr gg jogging again.. 2.4km here i come. haha come to think of it,it's quite sad lor.. when i'm having holis everyone's like so super busy.. dint even contact or arrange to go out.. i just cant be bothered also.. haiya.. that's life la.. yep yep and YOU. yes YOU if u know i'm referring to YOU earlier on. drop me a note can? i really want to know. please. outta here!!!

:/

when a guy and a girl becomes good friends, are they really just that? what if either party falls in love with the other party? i'm just saying IF. can both parties really forsee the fact that they are of different genders? haiya.. i also dont know la. damns so confusing. :-X check out www.v-0f-us.blogspot.com There i speak more logic.. haha i cant be bothered to blog the same stuff again..

sick..

oh man.. i'm sick again.. last week i was also sick but tot i had recovered ler but sat i was caught in the rain again so revert back again. went to the doc and he just gave a a few medication that made me feel so drowsy and grogy de.. what the heck lor.. feeling so sleepy and my mind is so not clear. dont even know what i'm doing.. haiz supposed to be doing sociology de but dont know what the heck am i doing online blogging.. haiz cant resist all the temptations at home so i must really go out to study but now everyone has class and no one can pei2 wo3.. :`( haiz but feeling so sick now think go out study i'll also fall asleep lor.. sigh why must i fall sick at the wrong time? during the holis i must be sick. damns. but see all my friends around me all so stressed lidat then i'm still slacking my life away.. Ey.. think i dont know what i am talking about ler need to go off liao i from yest until now havent bathe.. haha so hygienic right.. lolz too tired and felt so knocked out lor.. no energy. ciaoz.. love all~

ZZZZzzz

back home early from school.. yawn went swimming and supposed to go do stuff for the camp next week.. think i'm doomed.. havent started on anything yet.. oh man. haiz ok la bye~ just a short one.